I am competetive to the point of retardation

I went to they gym yesterday and sat down on one of the reclining bikes with Time magazine thinking that I would poke along and read about Obama's electablility. I set the stationary bike on a "race mode" where you put in the pace of the race (20mph) and the distance (10 miles).

"Race Mode" such as it was consisted of two red dots on a 4"x4" screen. One was me and one was my opponent and we both circled the boundery of the screen counter-clockwise. About two minutes in I was completely hooked and I ended up racing the machine like I was in an actual race, panting till I couldn't take it anymore. When it was done, I had sweated through both the front and the back of my shirt and I could hardly walk.

The whole thing made me realize just how different my life is here, that I have to race a stationary bike in order to feed my competetive nature.

Lapped that dot twice though. Try fucking with me next time you red flashing motherfucker.

Yeah!

No, You Tell ME What's Worse

The genocide in Darfur
The sectarian strife in Iraq
The reality of a Nuclear North Korea

We now have to deal with:

JESSICA SIMPSON PLAYING A FUCKING BIKE MESSENGER!!